Monday, August 27, 2007

School Time Grind

Classes have started here at the good ole 'Hurst. I like 2 of them: Video Production and Prehistory of Eastern North America. Those are going to be my favorite. I do not like my European History before the Renaissance class so far. We had a quiz and I failed it. He asked these uber-detailed questions. Oh well. I have plenty of other chances to make it up.

This RA thing should go well this year. I have some cool residents. I do have one that may be some problems. She likes to party a little too loud. I love my peace and quiet and I will not tolerate it being disturbed. So I am going to have to check that. It is weird being one of the elders on my staff. All the new people ask me for advice. My AD expects me to step up and be a leader. Being one of the elder statesman is cool.

Now here comes the love life situation. There is a girl I am seeing. We have been friends for a while but things changed in Texas. We started spending a lot of time together, watching the stars and flirting. I guess people noticed it. So now we are involved. She broke up with her man at the beginning of summer so we are taking it slow. She stays the night over here. We just stay up watching movies and talking. I am suppose to cook dinner for her and she is my date for formal. The only reason I am going is because of her. I am going to be careful. I dont want her to make a rush decision or anything. I gotta protect myself.

But anyways, I am leaving you folks to your own devices. I need some food and blogging does not put any food in my refrigerator. Yet.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007


There has been an incident that has moved me. I has left me in deep reflection

A young student athlete was pregnant. She had hid the pregnancy from everyone. The day that I arrived here on campus she gave birth to the child. The child only lived 10 minutes. There is a full investigation. The baby died of asphyxiation and the death was labeled a homicide. The DA has yet to press charges.

When I heard the story all I could do was feel for the young woman. While everyone else was looking at what the girl could have done to prevent this, I felt for her. People condemned while I just empathized.

Now if the girl killed the child. I am not excusing the behavior. That is wrong if that is what happened. But I can see why she killed the child. She had a kid in her apartment by herself. She hid this pregnancy from people and did not want anyone to know. She was probably scared. She felt that she had no one in her corner. Panic probably ensued once the baby dropped.

I just feel for her. Now her life will never be the same. She probably will never return to Mercyhurst. If she did kill the child, it will be on her conscious forever. All I can do is feel compassion. I cannot judge; I refuse to. I would hope that in her position I would do the right thing but I may never know. I may never be in her position. All I do is pray for her. Because she does not need another person to judge her; her fear of that is what created the situation in he first place.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Back At School

I am back in Erie and ready to do this college thing again. I have been up here since Sunday and I realized something. I actually missed this place. I really don't like Erie. It is ugly and boring. Yet I have inexplicably grown attached to it. It sometimes pulls at my heart. It feels comfortable and familiar. Somehow, I have grown and adjusted to this place. Its cold as shit here yet I wait for those winters. Its weird.

RA training is going well. I like my staff this year. Well, at least most of the people. Some are trying to create dissension. As an elder statesman on my staff, I will definitely try and make it better. I will do my bets to prevent all the cliques and everything. I have some other stuff to report but I may speak on it later. It is of a sensitive nature. Everyone take care. You will hear from me soon.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Sounds In My Mind

* America Ferrera is damn attractive.

* Sean Kingston sounds horrible live
* I am ready to quit doing this damn thesis proposal. Just give me my damn General Science degree
* Its hot in Baltimore. I am ready to go back to Erie.
* I love having dinner with Wise
* I would love to buy Common's album legally. I just am broke. So I am actually gonna wait and support a brother instead of downloading it.
* Plies song "Shawty" is the shit. I cannot explain it. The verses are not the greatest but that chorus jumps. The bea is catchy and I cant get it out of my head.
* Why my younger brother did not want me to go to the carnival with him? He is a punk.
* My friend Cassie visited Monday night and we had a blast.
* I am a borderline crudball kind of guy. Maybe one day I will explain.
* I have no clue what I want to do when I graduate college and I am perfectly fine with that.

Monday, August 06, 2007

Interracial Crisis

I am having a crisis of the heart.

I told Cnel about this while in Texas. That trip really really pulled on my soul. Thats why I wont blog or post pics (plus I lost the cord to connect my camera to my comp lol). It really left my soul hurting. Here is why.

I am reconsidering my stance on interracial dating, specifically between Blacks and Whites. I am not saying am stopping but I am cosider that I should stop dating interracially. I had discovered a lot in Texas. Not discovered, but more came to terms. I realized that our society still has a lot of ignorance. That as much as we have integrated, Whites still know very little about Black people.

Now I do not expect that Whites understand everything. I guess I thought that we were further along. I felt that maybe it was not as bad among people in my age group. I thought that anthropologists-in-training were more aware, especially since we study culture. I was wrong

While in Texas, some of the people (all female since they were the vast majority while there) just made some retarded comments. The sad thing is that they were not even malicious. They were born out of the fact that these people have limited knowledge of interacting with people of color. I ended up having to defend my people and what we do. I know that Black people have issues. We really do. Some of us do some ridiculous shit. But (this may sound old school) I just could not let them criticize us. I just couldn't.

The experience made me think. Do I want to have to explain things to a woman who is White?? I just am tired of having to explain my Blackness. I feel like its on trial. I guess I am tired. I just want someone who understands where I am coming from and can accept it.

Then there is a part of me that says I can't stop dating interracially. There is a young lady who is White. I have known her for a long time. We are friends. We spent a lot of time together in Texas. Now, we both are kind of feeling each other. We even have a date for when we get back. So now I feel like I cannot exclude her because of her skin color. She is a good person. I cannot justify reconsidering my dating stance with the fact that I find her attractive. I have always been raised to not judge people by their skin color but I feel like I am doing it now. Who knows. I am just confused.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

My Response

My friend Cnel wrote a 7 part blog series about a girl named "Harvard Girl". Many asked what my response would be and here it goes.

I think that the girl was bad news. I felt that she was irresponsible and immature. I do not even think she valued his friendship that much. Here is why. The way she let him was crazy rude. She asked "Are you serious?? I hope you are." That is not appropriate and very rude. Thus I do not like the chick. She is an F in my book. It took her more than a year to apologize. Plus she was not that cute too. She had a funny shaped head.

I think that there are no ideals. From my experience, we all have too many personality faults to consider anyone an ideal. There are just too many personality quirks. They make us beautiful These make us interesting. They are very annoying. However, they do not make us ideal.

Plus what happens is that you do as they say on "40 Year Old Virgin" (and excuse my language): You put the pussy on a pedestal. You never want to do that. When this happens, one's judgment becomes clouded. You tend to ignore the important facts. It just makes things muddled. One wants to stay sharp and having an ideal (putting the pussy on a pedestal) makes you a little less sharp. Also, you miss out on this person's faults. Sometimes the ugly is beautiful.