Sunday, April 29, 2007

I knew walking into that situation I was setting myself up for heartbreak. I knew it. I had that gut feeling on the inside. That one where you say to yourself, "I am about to do something very very stupid.". But I guess I had trusted her. I trusted her with my emotions. I thought that because of our past history, thats he would be careful. She knew my emotions were a little fragile. I may not let on but she knew. I told her. Maybe that is where I failed. I let her back in. I thought things would be like they were. I felt myself fall. I got caught up in the hope. I always am willing to take risks. I figure that if you never try then you always fail. This time, I failed miserably.

I am trying to not be bitter. I am trying to not take it out on anyone. I do not want to build walls. That is what she did. She decided to play it safe. But what she fails to realize is that she will make the same mistakes that I made in the past, the ones that she cannot get over. Those walls end up isolating us, not protecting. They hurt. And now I hurt. Never again. Never in the history.

7 comments:

`NEFTY said...

Awww, cheer-up!

Ms.Honey said...

I tell ya....you want me to meet her in a dark alley?

Jameil said...

know what? be glad you found out NOW about the instability. better now than 4 kids, a house and a dog in the future.

Mr.Slish said...

I been there.

As a matter of fact The woman I call my future put me in that position several times before we finally found some common ground. Now we're together.

How I did it. Well I'll tell ya. I let her know how i felt and was cocky enough to let her in on the very fact that I was tne only man for her and I would not be waiting around for her to realize that I was her future. At the time she didn't agree and dismissed my ego driven speech.

5 months later the Call came " baby you were right. I just couldn't see it"

So bruh I'm not telling you to wait just be prepared cause sooner or later she will get herself a new pair of glasses.

Blu Jewel said...

Mr. Slish summed it up very well. While she's doing her and going through changes, keep on doing you and allow yourself to heal and grown.

kathi said...

Ditto Mr. Slish and blu jewel. I still think about the men that loved me more than I could handle at the time and I do regret not taking that chance.
She's just not ready yet, but hopefully she'll see that your kind of love is something she can't get from anyone else BUT you.
In the meantime...live, babe. Live.

Anonymous said...

Listen to Mr. Slish obviously a wise man.

I'm telling you patience, yet persistence, but protect yourself. Be prepared cause the right time, ain't necessarily right now, but don't close yourself off from the possibility finally being your reality.