Friday, January 15, 2010

Mass Transit Folk

I take public transportation to work I have made some observations. There are always the same characters! Here they go:

Jesus Freak
This is the person who gets on the bus and train and greets everyone with a "Good morning! Praise Jesus!". Then, they try and get everyone to sing some gospel song or recite some Bible verse. They come sit next to you and want to teach you the joys of the "good news" These people need to realize that at 8am in the morning, the only good news I want to hear is I am getting paid or getting off work. Thats it. No offense, but even God hates early mornings

Booty Girl
This is the girl who has a "Big Booty Judy"-type of butt. Her pants hardly fits. It look like it took 1/2 hour to get in them jeans. Most likely she is young, around 18 or a lil older. Every man on the bus or train is peeking at her panties (most likely thongs). Even though I know its wrong, I look. I sure do. It might be tasteless to have a booty sticking out, but a brother gets curious.

Leaning Tower of Crack

I am sure every city has one of these! The crackhead that leans so far over they can lick their own toes. They eyes  roll into the back of their head and they gone. This type of transit rider then will ask for a cigarette, knowing good and well they can't keep their head up, nonetheless a cigarette in their hand. They can be hilarious and bring joy to a morning commute.

The Entrpreneur
This is the man/woman who gets on the bus or trains and sells soap, socks and batteries. You know the type. In Baltimore, someone is always selling something on the bus I have seen these items for sale: soap, toothbrush, batteries, cd, dvds, vacuum cleaner, air freshener, water, soda, cigarettes, paint, and weave. The entrepreneur has the best deal you can find on everyday items!

She Got Kids!
This is the person who has 50 million kids. Now, it would not be a problem except the kids are hell to deal with. One kid is yelling and screaming while the other is crawling under the seats. A third is drawing on windows. The 4th child is talking to random folk. The kicker is then the mom starts wildin' out on the children, yelling and screaming delivering whippings like Bruce Lee with nunchucks. This is the most embarrising part...

Add types as you see fit

4 comments:

Jameil said...

I don't want to talk in the morning either!! You could've kept booty girl to yourself! I'm amazed by the entrepreneurs. Vacuum cleaner???? What have YOU bought is the real question! Lol

C. Nel said...

LoL

Anonymous said...

Jameil - I am not going to lie, I have bought batteries, cds, and dvds from someone off the bus.

C-Nel - I am sure you have some great MTA stories.

kathi said...

I've never been on public transportation before. :( I can't IMAGINE the things you are talking about. I need to visit.