Friday, September 16, 2005

Aunt Jackie

Today three years ago my Aunt Jackie died. The affect that her death has on me is enormous. I think about her everyday no matter what. Life is just not the same since she died.

I always think about how she used to tell me she could not wait for me to reach certain milestones in my life. For example, she always said how she wanted to come to some of my football games. She could not wait for high school graduation, move-in day at college, my wedding in the future. Now I think about all that she is going to miss. It really eats me up inside because I should be thankful for all that she has seen. I feel angry at the fact that she is not going to see the birth of my children, my wedding, my college graduation. She did not get to see me play football. She died before I could graduate from high school. I feel angry and bitter. I feel cheated because she could not share this with me.

I do know one thing: She would definitely be proud of me.

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