There is something I want to blog about. It is about her. But I feel as if I cant because I mention her too much. There is always something about us going on. I wish it would stop.
I wish she did not play in my mind all the fucking time!! She is still the first thing I thnk about when I wake up and the last before I go to sleep. I am always hoping that she is doing well. I am curious about how she is doing. There are times that I still want to call her just to say hello. I cannot stop staring at her whne we are in class. I purposely came late so that I could miss her presentation today. I just cant deal with it. Why can't I just erase her from my memory. It would be sooooooo much easier.
My heart strings are being pulled on. I found something out that made me angry. When I got the info, I immediately put the punching gloves in my bag. I went ot class and went staright to the gym from there. I decided against the heavy bag and lifted weights like it was no ones business. I just felt the hurt flow into the weights as I moved them. I just exhauseted myself until I could not think about her. Now that I am alone with my thoughts, she just sits and marinates in my mind. I just need to get rid of her; remove her from my head. But I cannot seem to. The memory of her now haunts me.
She is in a relationship with someone else...
10 comments:
It's YOUR blog...talk about Her as much as you need.
I'm sorry you are in so much pain right now. Now that you have this information, do you think that this solidifies the end?
Eps deal with it, don't run away from it, because its not going to get any easier. You keep talking about moving forward, and its your time to progress not regress. While it might seem as if your happiness is forever tied to what was, imagine it as only foreshadowing of what will be. You will receive your complement. You might as well express yourself in some way or another. Hit the cell if you need to talk man to man.
Can't argue with Dollface and Cnel... Face it, move forward and deal directly. Trust me, we'll laugh over this time and space in the years to come. It's a matter of picking up and getting just as happy as she is.
i know it has to hurt like nobody's business ... u think that happy thoughts will forever be connected to a person that you care for like her... and then when it all changes ... its becomes sickening... that no good feelin in the pit of your stomach ...wishin it would disappear ... wishin it could change ... or that she would change ... only in truth you know it never will ... but dont give up ... cause you are an amaaaazing black man ... and youve got things to do with your life ... a future that is full of so many possibilities ... and its her loss that she wont be able to be a part of that ...keep ya head up!!!
I've been where you are and only time is going to make the hurt any less painful. But, and I know this is a small consilation, this is the sort of experience that you will draw from. As far as writing, your best posts are about the way you feel about her. This, other than the pain we know you're feeling, was a great post. I don't know what you're wanting to do with your life, but I definitely hope writing is one of your choices.
Damn E, that's rough... i'm sorry to hear that, its always tough hearing that the other person has moved on, but don't worry it definitely her lost, she's the one that missed out on a good guy... I know its definitely easier said than done, but just try to move on...
~DD
Hey Eps!
This was a heartwarming post. I know how you feel; I've been there, done that. To get myself over it, I sought other things to occupy my mind. Before long, he was gone out of my mind.
It's okay (I think) to call her and say hello every once in a while; remaining friendly with the person always helps you get over it. Maybe you should make yourself available to other single girls around you. You never know; maybe one of them is waiting for a chance to be with you and experience your awesome Mack power... just a thought, Bro.
damn. it will get easier, but you gotta let it out homie and where better than your blog?
I feel your pain.
But what can you do?
Glad that you deal with it in healthy ways... going the gym instead of doing something self destructive. Am sad right along with you; being where you are right now is no fun at all.
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